Consent

Consent is so vital to good sex and is much more than a simple yes or no, particularly where touch - and especially intimate touch - is involved. There are graduations of what we want to do to another and what we want to have done to us when we are in intimate situations, and it’s not uncommon that sometimes we want more or less of something at any given moment. This dynamism means we need to be able to ask for things, change something that could be better, move around to enhance pleasure, or - for example - simply seek consent to sink deeper into surrender. The possibilities are endless.

This dynamic nature of consent makes it an invaluable and interesting tool of erotic play and it can really free up the connection between people to allow for much more fulfilling intimacy and deeper and more satisfying pleasure. This is because - when consent and the limits that come with what we want and what we don’t want are clear, there is absolute freedom to play within explicitly discussed and agreed boundaries. If we are able to clearly notice, trust, value and communicate our desires clearly and then have those desires met within a safe and trusting environment we are far far more likely to experience freedom, pleasure, satisfaction and fulfilment in our erotic experiences.

Check out the Betty Martin and Robyn Dalzen text in the resources section of this blog to read more about the Wheel of Consent.

The Giving and Receiving offering is a really great way to explore consent in our erotic life.